When someone asks, “What turns you on?” itâs a deeply personal question that can be intriguing, awkward, or even flirty, depending on the context.
How you respond can reflect your comfort level, your relationship with the person, and the tone of the conversation.
Here are 30 thoughtful, playful, and respectful ways to answer, along with tips on when and when not to use each response.
1. “A good sense of humor always gets me.”
- Story: During a lighthearted conversation, a date asked me what turns me on. I replied, âA good sense of humor always gets me.â It was honest and kept the mood fun.
- When to use: In a casual, flirty setting where you want to keep the conversation light.
- When not to use: If the conversation is very serious or if youâre not comfortable discussing personal preferences.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A good sense of humor always gets me.”
2. “Confidence is incredibly attractive to me.”
- Story: A friend asked me about my preferences, and I said, âConfidence is incredibly attractive to me.â Itâs a straightforward and positive response.
- When to use: When you want to emphasize admiration for confidence in a respectful way.
- When not to use: If the person asking is someone youâre not comfortable sharing personal details with.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Confidence is incredibly attractive to me.”
3. “Intelligence and passion are big turn-ons for me.”
- Story: While discussing personal interests, I mentioned that âIntelligence and passion are big turn-ons for me.â It was a way to share what I find intriguing about people.
- When to use: When youâre in a deeper conversation about what you value in others.
- When not to use: In casual or superficial conversations where you want to keep things light.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Intelligence and passion are big turn-ons for me.”
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4. “Someone whoâs genuinely kind and considerate.”
- Story: When asked about what attracts me, I replied, âSomeone whoâs genuinely kind and considerate.â It was important to me to highlight the value of kindness.
- When to use: When you want to emphasize the importance of character and values.
- When not to use: If youâre looking for a more playful or less serious conversation.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Someone whoâs genuinely kind and considerate.”
5. “A great smile and positive energy are irresistible.”
- Story: During a casual chat, I said, âA great smile and positive energy are irresistible.â It was a fun and light-hearted way to share what I find attractive.
- When to use: In a relaxed setting where you want to keep the conversation upbeat.
- When not to use: If youâre having a more serious or deep conversation.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A great smile and positive energy are irresistible.”
6. “Creativity and a sense of adventure really attract me.”
- Story: I mentioned to someone that âCreativity and a sense of adventure really attract me.â It was a way to share what excites me in a partner.
- When to use: When you want to highlight traits related to personal interests and experiences.
- When not to use: If you prefer a more conventional or straightforward response.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Creativity and a sense of adventure really attract me.”
7. “A passionate conversation about something meaningful.”
- Story: I was having a deep discussion when someone asked me this question. I said, âA passionate conversation about something meaningful.â It showed my appreciation for depth and engagement.
- When to use: When discussing intellectual or meaningful topics.
- When not to use: In light-hearted or casual contexts where such a deep response might not fit.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A passionate conversation about something meaningful.”
8. “Someone who is open and honest about their feelings.”
- Story: I value transparency and said, âSomeone who is open and honest about their feelingsâ when asked. It was a way to express the importance of emotional honesty.
- When to use: When discussing emotional connections and honesty.
- When not to use: If the conversation is more focused on physical attraction or casual interests.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Someone who is open and honest about their feelings.”
9. “A good listener who pays attention.”
- Story: I mentioned that âA good listener who pays attentionâ turns me on. It was a way to highlight how important communication is to me.
- When to use: When discussing qualities related to communication and relationship dynamics.
- When not to use: If the conversation is focused more on physical attributes or less serious topics.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A good listener who pays attention.”
10. “Someone who is passionate about their hobbies.”
- Story: I was talking about interests and said, âSomeone who is passionate about their hobbiesâ turns me on. It reflects my appreciation for enthusiasm and dedication.
- When to use: When discussing interests and hobbies.
- When not to use: In contexts where you want to focus on personal or intimate preferences.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Someone who is passionate about their hobbies.”
11. “A sense of mystery and intrigue.”
- Story: During a flirty conversation, I said, âA sense of mystery and intrigueâ turns me on. It added an element of excitement and curiosity to the discussion.
- When to use: In a playful or flirty conversation where you want to add an element of excitement.
- When not to use: If the conversation is very straightforward or focused on specific preferences.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A sense of mystery and intrigue.”
12. “Confidence mixed with humility.”
- Story: I mentioned that âConfidence mixed with humilityâ is attractive to me. It was a way to express that I value a balanced and grounded personality.
- When to use: When discussing traits related to self-assurance and humility.
- When not to use: In casual conversations where a simpler response might be more appropriate.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Confidence mixed with humility.”
13. “A strong work ethic and determination.”
- Story: I was talking about what I admire in others and said, âA strong work ethic and determinationâ turns me on. It reflects my appreciation for dedication and ambition.
- When to use: When discussing values related to hard work and perseverance.
- When not to use: If youâre looking for a more playful or casual response.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A strong work ethic and determination.”
14. “Someone who makes me laugh.”
- Story: During a fun conversation, I said, âSomeone who makes me laughâ is a big turn-on. It was a light-hearted way to share what I find attractive.
- When to use: In casual or flirty conversations where humor is a key element.
- When not to use: If the conversation is serious or focused on deeper personal traits.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Someone who makes me laugh.”
15. “A caring and supportive nature.”
- Story: I value emotional support and replied, âA caring and supportive natureâ turns me on. It emphasizes the importance of empathy and kindness.
- When to use: When discussing emotional qualities and supportive behaviors.
- When not to use: In more superficial or less serious contexts.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A caring and supportive nature.”
16. “Someone who is passionate about making a difference.”
- Story: I mentioned that âSomeone who is passionate about making a differenceâ is attractive to me. It shows my appreciation for people who are driven by purpose.
- When to use: When discussing values related to social impact and purpose.
- When not to use: If the conversation is more focused on personal or physical preferences.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Someone who is passionate about making a difference.”
17. “Someone who is adventurous and spontaneous.”
- Story: I said, âSomeone who is adventurous and spontaneousâ turns me on. It reflects my love for excitement and new experiences.
- When to use: When discussing traits related to excitement and spontaneity.
- When not to use: If you prefer to focus on more stable or predictable qualities.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Someone who is adventurous and spontaneous.”
18. “A person who is genuine and authentic.”
- Story: I value authenticity and responded with, âA person who is genuine and authenticâ turns me on. It highlights the importance of being true to oneself.
- When to use: When discussing personal values and authenticity.
- When not to use: In casual conversations where a more light-hearted response might be preferred.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A person who is genuine and authentic.”
19. “Someone who challenges me intellectually.”
- Story: I said, âSomeone who challenges me intellectuallyâ is attractive to me. It shows my appreciation for mental stimulation and engaging conversations.
- When to use: When discussing intellectual attraction and mental engagement.
- When not to use: If youâre not in a mood for deep or complex topics.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Someone who challenges me intellectually.”
20. “A person who is caring and nurturing.”
- Story: I responded with, âA person who is caring and nurturingâ when asked about my preferences. It reflects my value for kindness and emotional support.
- When to use: When discussing traits related to care and support.
- When not to use: If the context is more focused on physical attraction or less serious.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A person who is caring and nurturing.”
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21. “Someone who shares my values and goals.”
- Story: I said, âSomeone who shares my values and goalsâ turns me on. It was a way to express the importance of alignment in key aspects of life.
- When to use: When discussing compatibility and shared life goals.
- When not to use: If the conversation is not focused on long-term compatibility.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Someone who shares my values and goals.”
22. “A person with a positive and optimistic outlook.”
- Story: I mentioned that âA person with a positive and optimistic outlookâ turns me on. It reflects my appreciation for a hopeful and uplifting attitude.
- When to use: When discussing attitudes and outlooks on life.
- When not to use: If the conversation is more focused on serious or deeper personal traits.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A person with a positive and optimistic outlook.”
23. “Someone who is emotionally intelligent and empathetic.”
- Story: I replied with, âSomeone who is emotionally intelligent and empatheticâ when asked. It highlights the importance of understanding and compassion in relationships.
- When to use: When discussing emotional intelligence and empathy.
- When not to use: If the conversation is more light-hearted or less focused on emotional depth.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Someone who is emotionally intelligent and empathetic.”
24. “A person who is respectful and considerate.”
- Story: I said, âA person who is respectful and considerateâ turns me on. It reflects my value for respect and thoughtful behavior in relationships.
- When to use: When discussing mutual respect and consideration in interactions.
- When not to use: If the conversation is focused more on casual or physical preferences.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A person who is respectful and considerate.”
25. “Someone who is ambitious and driven.”
- Story: I mentioned that âSomeone who is ambitious and drivenâ is attractive to me. It shows my admiration for motivation and goal-oriented behavior.
- When to use: When discussing traits related to ambition and motivation.
- When not to use: If youâre looking for a more casual or non-ambitious response.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Someone who is ambitious and driven.”
26. “A person who values personal growth and learning.”
- Story: I said, âA person who values personal growth and learningâ turns me on. It reflects my appreciation for self-improvement and intellectual curiosity.
- When to use: When discussing personal development and lifelong learning.
- When not to use: In contexts where a more immediate or physical attraction is the focus.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A person who values personal growth and learning.”
27. “Someone who has a genuine passion for something.”
- Story: I mentioned that âSomeone who has a genuine passion for somethingâ turns me on. It shows that I admire enthusiasm and dedication.
- When to use: When discussing interests and passions.
- When not to use: If the conversation is focused on other types of attraction.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Someone who has a genuine passion for something.”
28. “A person who is fun-loving and playful.”
- Story: I said, âA person who is fun-loving and playfulâ turns me on. It was a way to express my appreciation for a joyful and light-hearted attitude.
- When to use: When youâre in a playful or fun conversation.
- When not to use: If youâre discussing more serious or profound aspects of attraction.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A person who is fun-loving and playful.”
29. “Someone who is open-minded and accepting.”
- Story: I mentioned that âSomeone who is open-minded and acceptingâ turns me on. It highlights the importance of inclusivity and understanding in relationships.
- When to use: When discussing values related to acceptance and open-mindedness.
- When not to use: In conversations focused more on personal or physical attraction.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “Someone who is open-minded and accepting.”
30. “A person with a great sense of style and elegance.”
- Story: I said, âA person with a great sense of style and eleganceâ turns me on. It reflects my appreciation for aesthetic and refined tastes.
- When to use: When discussing physical attributes or personal style.
- When not to use: If the conversation is focused more on personality traits or deeper connections.
Example:
Person: “What turns you on?”
You: “A person with a great sense of style and elegance.”
